Why Double Texting is Bad (And When It’s Ok)
Whaddup my playas!! In this article, I’m going to go into depth about why double texting can be devastating and how you can lose a match and the attraction real quick with no way back.
We, at PWF will always preach to be persistent without being needy; and double texting without following a few guidelines will make you kick yourself when you lose matches.
First, I’d like to break down the most common reasons why guys double text.
- Impatience: As soon as they send a text, guys expect women to reply. They feel like she’d need another ping or needs to know a little extra about him before she is sold on replying.
- Fear of rejection: They overthink why a woman may not reply to them as soon as possible. They feel like they have their personality on the line when they text their match. The time between the text he sends and the reply received, the mind runs faster than Usain Bolt. They’d feel dejected if the woman never replies to their text and feel like shit after
- Scarcity: This comes from a lack of options/matches and not having shit to do in life other than pursuing women. A good profile following steps from this guide will put you above most of the profiles online and get you matches with ease. If you don’t have a solid profile, you tend to get more attached to the less quantity of matches you get.
- Second-guessing: Guys tend to keep the bar of a good text so high and want to send the best possible text which demonstrates maximum wit and humor to get the girl to reply. And sometimes, from excitement even if they send something good, they second guess their decision and try to cover up a tiny flaw in their text (which usually is absent but the overthinking messes things up)
All the above have been solely based on a false assumption that women don’t have a life outside online dating. Most times, women go days without even checking their app. Just unintentionally but in the end, it proves good for them since they can weed out needy guys with ease.
I’m going to go through some of the bad examples now which show exactly what you SHOULDN’T be doing and what could have been done differently
This is an extreme example. But, sadly not a rare one. Guys get so anxious that she is not replying asap. As you can see the timestamps that he had no Patience to get a reply. If you do this, you guarantee to dry her pussy up and turn her off for good. Instead, he could have just said “That was a lotta fun” and give her 24-48 hr time to reply back
Again, terrible way to double text even though the texts are spaced out. He is calling her “hun”. That comes across too strong and women get turned off. Asks if she is busy and she tells she is. He follows up with an “Aww :(“ which again shows a lack of options. Follows it up with two “Hey”s.
When you double text without following the simple rules I’m about to go through, you can bid goodbye to the match of your life.
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- Space it out: You should always keep in mind that no matter how instantly she was replying before the last text you sent out, she could have just been on the phone before she went to work or was pooping before jumping in the shower. Don’t double text on the same day if you still haven’t set up a date. Leave at least 24 hours between the last text you sent to ping her to check her app unless you already made plans and it’s time-sensitive to re-confirm.
- Ping rather than push:It takes very little to come across pushy and needy. Rather treat a double text as a ping and not poking her with a stick constantly
- Don’t logically ask her to reply: The last thing you want to do is communicate to her that you dropped everything you were doing and have been waiting for a reply from her. Asking questions like “Are you busy?”, “Can you respond?”, “Why are you not replying?” will only bring light to the situation
- Challenge her: Challenge her by being sarcastic or terming her as shy or innocent for the text you sent. Almost making it seem like she can’t handle what you sent. For example, “If you’re too shy or innocent, I’d totally understand”, “Are you always this talkative”
Now let’s see all these simple rules in action. You’ll notice how easily things can turn around even if there was a lull in the conversation
Example 1:
Takeaways:
- As you can see, the conversation turns to a good flirty vibe with the guy talking about imagining her in a pencil-thin skirt. This could have easily been one of those texts where the guy would think to himself “Damn. Is this too sexual and is that why she stopped replying?”.
- He Spaces it out (Point 1) and challenges her (Point 2) with “If you’re too shy, I’d totally understand”
- The legit reason that she went to sleep and didn’t check the app also reinforces that women don’t really check dating apps as often as us. So, there is no reason to be impatient
Example 2:
Takeaways:
- Very critical stage where she stopped replying. He pitched in a romantic date and she asked for a plan. He sends a decent text describing the events that may happen on the date.
- No reply for two days. So, he doesn’t push her but just Pings her again to reply
- “If you’re too shy, I’d totally understand!”. Turns out she was on a vacation. She never read the text but is actually into the whole plan.
- Good place to number close following the framework
Example 3:
Takeaways:
- He spaces it out 4 days before double texting with “Are you always this talkative?”. The same principle applies where he’s just Pinging her rather than pushing
- For more on how to turn around dead conversations, you can refer to this article
Example 4: (From our IG: @realplayingfire. Follow us for lots of free value)
Key takeaways:
1) The first screenshot starts off with him trying to confirm the date which he already set. She doesn’t reply and hence he hits her with “If you’re too nervous, I’d understand”
2) This is a different kind of example since the girl stopped texting because of an emotional concern (Something that is stopping her from going through with the meet)
- She had a legit reason that she had a bad experience recently and she doesn’t want to put herself through something like that again after he asks her “What exactly are your concerns?”
- Alex very calmly lets her know that she can’t just keep playing safe and do this to herself.
- She very easily agrees with him and wants to give it a shot to meet up. He confirms plans and they meet
As you can see, there could be a number of reasons why a girl isn’t responding. Assuming the worst and trying to “recover” something even though it wasn’t a failure will only spell doom for your matches AND your inner sanity. When you frequently get ghosted or flaked on, THEN you know you have a real issue behind your text game and that you need to reflect back to what mistakes you might be making. Make sure to check out the guides here to pinpoint what your sticking points could be.
One thing that has also helped me when I get anxious about not receiving a reply is to calm down, meditate, take a breather and go for a walk. And of course, the PWF Online Dating Blueprint helps you learn how to send the optimal text the right time, so you can avoid worrying after sending your message.
Regards,
Indian “Double text me anytime” PE