How to Get Better at Texting Girls (Level Up Your Text Game)
A lot of men are curious about “How good” they are at texting girls. Are they beginners? Are they intermediates? Or have they reached that mythical advanced status? In this article, I’m going to analyze one of my “one on one” coaching clients and show how we took his text game from “beginner” to intermediate/advanced. My goal with this breakdown is to allow you to realize how skilled your text game is. That way, you can understand what skills you are missing and how to “level up”.
Beginner Text Game
This was pretty much what a level above socially autistic text game looks like. There are no glaring mistakes that make the girl want to block you, but everything else is “beginner level”. Let’s take a look at the major texting mistakes that he’s making here.
Boring conversation – Let’s take a look at this from the girl’s perspective. This whole conversation lacks any kind of emotional engagement. There is not one thing which he says that “catches her attention” or even peaks her curiosity. In the modern dating world, where the girls are getting hit by legions of guys everyday, this is an issue. Fortunately, the vast majority of guys are also just as “boring”. Let’s take a lot at a specific example from the conversation
“Great. Assignments piling up i’m guessing”
This was quite a boring response to her question. He is talking about schoolwork which is probably the most boring thing you can pick. A much better reply would have been to purposely misinterpret her text and say something like “Ah! Busy getting ready for our date already?”
… or
“Fuckin amazing!!! Chillin on my romantic balcony sipping wine”. Basically, anything that changes the mood of the convo to a more exciting one and grabs her attention
Lack of investment – This goes into the first mistake that we looked at. A boring conversation typically leads to a lack of investment. However, it is key to get some investment from the girl before going for the close as we always write about in PWF, getting investment from the girl makes a night and day difference. It can make the difference between a girl making plans with you or a girl just making excuses.
In this whole text exchange, there is not one message that the girl sends that is longer than a sentence. An “advanced” guy will realize this and find a way to build investment. Example in second set of screenshots. On the other hand, a beginner will often ignore this and attempt to prematurely close
All “push”, no “pull” – In case you are not familiar with PUA lingo, “Push” is basically when you directly try to move things forward, essentially “pressure on”. On the other hand, “pull” is when you leave some space for her to invest in the interaction. Essentially, “pressure off”. Good text game and game in general is a healthy combination of these two. A very typical beginner mistake is to be all push and no pull.
From an outsider perspective, this looks like the guy is chasing the girl and trying to “get her”, instead of two mutually interested parties hitting it off and, unfortunately that’s the vibe you get in this interaction. The only part that was “pull” was what he said “Hmm. Solution?”
Pretty much, the rest of the interaction was pretty much all “push”
Poor closing – Aside from prematurely going for the close (which is a big issue as well), the actual close itself was very poorly executed. This is explained in detail but in short, you want to smoothly transition to the meetup.
You first get her to agree to the general idea of meeting up with you, before you start trying to make exact plans. And, when making plans, the ideal is to first get a feel for her schedule or give her multiple options before proposing an exact date/time.
Unfortunately, there was no smooth transition here. Out of nowhere, he wrote “Free tmr?”. This pretty much violated every principle of good closing. It wasn’t smooth. It didn’t get her to agree to the general idea of meeting up. And it didn’t give her options.
Overall, these 4 mistakes, are the biggest factors that worked against the student. If he had avoided them, the conversation could have had a completely different outcome. Now, let’s take a look at what happened after we gave him a PWF text game makeover
Advanced Text Game
Yes, this is the same person! The similarity between both interactions was that both try to frame the dynamic as a “hookup”, but, that’s where the similarities pretty much end.
Let’s examine more closely how this interaction avoids the four big mistakes mentioned earlier
Boring conversation – This conversation is far from boring/typical and is quite engaging. Through calibrated progressive sexualization, the student creates a fun and tension filled back and forth exchange. He balances out the sexualization with humor and banter, which makes the exchange even more interesting for the girl
Lack of investment – The level of investment from the girl here is much different than the previous one. This chick becomes more and more interested as the conversation goes on. She replies with detailed messages, instead of being stingy with her words. The student gets her more and more hooked in the conversation…to the point where she’s the one who tries to close him. Very good sign!
All “push”, no “pull” – Notice how this conversation has a completely different feel to it. It doesn’t feel like the student is chasing the girl as was the case with the previous one. Instead, it almost feels like she’s the one trying to get him. He creates a lot of space in the conversation for her to chase him…and she does!. This is a trademark of good text game and game in general
Poor closing – Due to the first 3 points, the girl actually tries to close him. She is the one who proposes the meetup, which makes the date much more solid. At that point, she has agreed to the general idea of meeting up. Nevertheless, the student doesn’t get too excited and fucks it up (Also a common thing with beginners).
Instead, he follows good closing strategy and offers her multiple date/time options. This has a much better outcome and he gets the date. (And the kinky sex!)
Overall, there is a night and day difference by the student between the two interactions.
The first one is clumsy and makes numerous beginner mistakes. On the other hand, the second one is much smoother and lacks any major text game mistakes. Just from reading the screenshots, you get a completely different feel. And whatever you feel, girls feel times 10 due to being the much more socially in-tuned sex.
After going through this article, hopefully you have a much better idea of where your text game is at. And, you now have 4 of the biggest texting mistakes that you know to watch out for.
If you are still unsure or are just looking feedback in general, make sure to post in the PWF forums and we will give you feedback on your text game. And, of course, If you’re serious about taking your results to the next level, make sure to check out the PWF Online Dating Blueprint.
Yours truly,
IndianPE.
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